la familia

The one on my left in the red is my sister Haley, she just left to go to Florida today. The taller one on my right is my sister Courtney and this week she has been a trooper, and has made me realize just how much my sisters mean to me. Court has just had her appendix out this week and has been in and out the hospital and has essentially been through hell. 

 I am taking a much needed vacation home this weekend. Home cooked food, a nice warm shower, free laundry, and my full size bed, that feels huge after sleeping in an extra long twin size bed all year. But most importantly to see my sister as she recovers from her surgery since she can no longer visit Haley in Florida due to this past weeks events. 

I myself have never really felt super close to many of my family members, but when something happens to someone you love, you realize just how much they mean to you. 

.22 and zombies

My mind is a hurricane, so many emotions whirling around at once.
I'm sad, I'm angry, I'm happy, I'm empty...
The place where I thought I belonged shut the door in my face, where do I go from here?
Read a book, watch a movie, listen to music, take a drive, what can I do to make my mind stop?
Go to sleep for a few hours and sleep my day away, talking to no one?
It's like I'm in a crowded room screaming at the top of my lungs and no one hears me, no one even turns to look.
I want to go shooting and empty my anger into a zombie target in the woods, I want to punch things to, I want to cry, I want a reason to smile...but what reasons do I have?
The people who lift my spirits are never around, I am always alone, no matter where I am or who I'm with. So what is there to do?
Nothing, absolutely nothing.
Turn on auto pilot, wake up, go to class, grab some food, eat by myself, go back to my room do some homework, go to sleep, repeat cycle.

*random spew of depressing thoughts done*

Blog #1

I am making a blog for the first time for an english class....don't expect much, I'm not a blogger.

I thought Michigan was a bi-polar state, try Indiana from ice storm to fifty degree thunderstorm. I guess I'll take the alternative, I like walking through warm puddles better than walking through freezing slush.

I got fired last friday...not sure if finding another job is a good idea, with classes and availability and being out of state it may be more hassle than it's worth.

I'm going to go have a girls day with my best friend and go grocery shopping! yay for spending money and being broke.

Peace out people.